Let your greatest mistakes become fuel for your greatest accomplishments.

Today, I will get right to it, because my thought stream is flowing and the message is simple. My beautiful sisters, do not wait for a man to choose you, and do not ever try to convince a man of your worth. While I may not have ever verbally or literally chased and beg a man to treat me as I deserve, I did allow a couple of them to get away with treating me less than they ever should have been allowed to. “Give him grace, Candace. He’s still figuring himself out.” is what I always led with. I was also fed every excuse in the book and kept being strung along with hopes and false intentions. However, that granted myself a lack of respect, loyalty, and honesty, time and time again. It is backwards. A man should naturally be convincing you to choose him. That is how they are wired. That is what a man is supposed to do, and that is what a man who knows himself and what he wants out of life (and you) does. The reverse dynamic will never yield prosperous results. I do not care what anyone says. Side note: That’s why I would never support proposing to a man. Yuck! Lol

As a woman, I recently was forced to take a look at myself and remember how divine and powerful that I am. I am gorgeous and magnetic. I am rare. I leave a warm and positive impact on people with my presence, and they tend to appreciate it. It is alright to forget, so long as we come right back and remove anything that continuously makes us forget. This happens to even the most confident and secure woman when dealing with failed connections. Sometimes, it is very easy to lose yourself in the image of how things could be, and what you think you want so badly. But did I really want that man like I thought I did?

Better yet, was he ever really who I thought I wanted? No darling, he was not. He was a broken and emotionally immature man who mastered a facade. I do not deserve to feel small and confused over the way that someone is treating me. People are more aware of their actions than they lead on. I am someone who would go against the world for the ones I love, be it family or friends. Truly. But I absolutely refuse to be manipulated into lingering around as a support system while being a place holder who can be dropped at any time. This was my experience more than twice. It ends now. My king and my tribe will want me at their side at all times. That is what I know.

More often than not though, even the mistakes that we make are blessings. Our power (and task) is in moving that energy and shifting perspective to be able to see the blessing. It’s alright to hurt as we heal. Those random throbs of pain where that trauma and confusion rises to the surface is the opportunity to face it and let go, piece by piece. That is how I have come to view it at this stage in my life. Surrender and gratitude is the key. God reveals it all at the end of every cycle. Once you accept things with full clarity and clear out whatever and whomever doesn’t align with your values, boundaries, and the standards you set for yourself, that is when the magic returns almost instantaneously. It is beautiful! Clarity is one of my favorite human experiences.

Keep your wings flexed and ready to go. Stay light and stay inspired! Love!